bottled emotions (not really, more like confession)

This will be my first writing in this site.

Communication has always been a problem to me. It is not that I'm not good with words; it's just that it's hard for me to express my emotions. My parents, siblings, and friends doesnt think good of me. They often misunderstand me, but just thinking of how i can clarify myself stresses me too much. Consequently, I am not able to do it. Yet, no matter what happens I always smile in front of people. I know that as an adolescent, I might be experiencing the identity vs. role confusion. However, I feel like maybe I'm just too fake of a person. I judge people as soon as I talk to them, after that I set how I act to them. I have never shown these emotions or thoughts, so people think of me as just someone soft ( like how I want to be portrayed). My emotions piled up for all these years and I never really vented it out. I started acting irritable, I direct my anger to objects ( I'm not the type to take anger out on people). Now, my family thinks that I have behavioral problems. I fucked up, my image might now be changed… 

ps. i might just be too egocentric…