I feel older today... again
I am 27, but I feel like I'm looking older.
I am supposed to go to the office today. I already put on my makeup (just a little bit cos I just started to do makeup in this past few days), dressed up, then lied to call in sick because I didn't feel like going out at the last moment. So I stayed in my apartment, put on more makeup to my eyes and wore the reddest lipstick. I decided to take my phone to take a picture of what I've done to my face, excited to see if the makeup makes me prettier, but just got disappointed cos I looked old. It was a little bit because of the makeup and the stressed eye in the camera. Disappointed. I turned off my camera. Worked from home for a while. Went to my partner's room for a hug and a rant. “I am getting old”, “I don't wanna get old”, “I'm scared, my skin is gonna get saggy”, these were the rants I made. He told me that it's okay, you are still pretty. Kind words, but I still felt sad. Went back to my room to work. Watched the remaining scenes of 2521 kdrama. Made me even feel sadder cos it's about getting older and changing. So I decided to write my own diary just to write whatever, whenever, however.
I still feel old.
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