Feeling like I woke up to reality and I’m not happy

I’ve been married since 2017 and have been together since 2012. I should have left him a long time ago. I didn’t realize that at the time I was chasing after the potential of what he could be instead of seeing him for who he really is. We fight nonstop. Our marriage is loveless and we haven’t had sex in 2 years. He thinks nothing is wrong. I have two young kids/baby. I feel like I’m stuck. He makes comments about my weight since the kids. I realized now at 36, I should have started single and figure out my own happiness and embrace singleness until I was ready to date. I should have also known it’s not easy to find someone compatible with you. The best way to date is to date multiple people so I’m not overly focused on one making me feel like that’s my only option. Only if I knew I wanted to be exclusive would I only date the one. I should have broke it off with my spouse years ago to find myself. Why am I just now realizing this? It feels like it’s too late. I’m too far in. I guess this is my life. I’ve only ever dreamed about love for my future but now I’m realizing that will never be my future.